Living provisionally is a form of procrastination. When we live provisionally, we put off making positive change in order to dwell in a state of helplessness where "nothing can be done". Though some of us are doomed to undergo the trials of Job, for most, it is nowhere near as dramatic as all that. Our circumstances may be far from ideal, but they are also probably far from catastrophic, and that means we have material from which we can create new and better patterns.

There are many sad human beings on TikTok. One especially morose individual I came across while scrolling was a young, attractive man. He lamented the workaday world and the pipeline of primary to graduate schooling that groomed him and other candidates to grease its wheels. He was crying. He longed to go outside and commune with the trees. He wanted to go back to the land. Most of all, he longed to go home to a paradise that only exists in his imagination. Like Peter Gibbons in the movie Office Space, ever since the day he started working, every day of his life has been worse than the one before it. The young man correctly perceived the office as an extension of school -- divorced from the seasons and rhythms of land, sea, moon, and sun. He had not chosen this fate directly and he had grown to hate it. He wept for lost time. He wept because he felt wasted and used. Mostly he wept because he saw no way forward that was not full of the same gray-beige flotsam of corporate garbage.

Unfortunately, I can easily see this man taking his own life, and that would be terrible because he has so much potential to make change for himself and to lead the way for others who feel the same about the corporate world. His comment section was full of agreement and copious blame of capitalism for creating the juggernaut that trapped him so well. The last time I checked, he was gaining a little traction singing original songs -- he has a lovely voice -- and there was a glimmer of hope that he could somehow monetize his talent.

It's never too early nor too late to go outside

The young man cried with longing for open sky and trees while he sat inside his apartment in the same business casual attire he wore to work. I hope I did not seem like a troll when I commented that he needed to go outside RIGHT NOW, sit with his back to a tree, and begin speaking to it as well as listening. What he failed to realize is that the outside world was waiting just beyond the door. You don't have to be a subsistence farmer or a native Sentinelese to walk outside, plonk yourself down under the nearest tree, and sit there until you feel something through the layers of industrialized-society numbness and psychic sludge heap you've been programmed to carry. Trees have been waiting for us humans to begin talking to them like we used to do, and they are only one class of beings in a nearly infinite crowd that awaits once we have reinvigorated our dormant. It is not complicated. All he needed to do was to take his ass out of the building, find a tree, look down to make sure he wasn't about to sit in a pile of dog turds, and sit for a few minutes.

Don't put off what you wish was perfect

How many times have you given up or not even tried because somebody already outdid you before you got started? That is the Faustian mentality at work: the demented idea that we must be the absolute best at any random hobby or activity or it is not worth doing. Perfectionism steals joy and prevents greatness. Besides, it is often those who laud themselves as the greatest ever who are the most mediocre. Consider the field of architecture: the supposed giants cannot produce a beautiful or durable building to save their lives. The biggest It Girls and It Boys in pop music don't write their own material, and when they do, it is laughably bad. The Metropolitan Museum of Art contains art that is nearly as bad as my dancing, without the sense of humor. As a piano teacher, I can assure you that there are many people who quit piano or do not take it up in the first place because they saw a video where a pressure-cooked Taiwanese six year old played a Bach invention at warp speed. The performance was not good -- mostly it was a testament to the wonders of a specific form of child abuse -- but they did not know that, and it black-pilled them into forgoing the smallest effort toward playing the piano.

The reason I have the best job in the world is because I instill a skill that does not just last a single lifetime. No, music education, when done correctly, is carried forever in the soul. Music is merely pattern recognition and assembly. It is also intense multitasking that acts as a form of prayer. I talk about this a spell in my upcoming book, Sacred Homemaking. Practice music often enough and it helps you self-realize via the cultivation of differentiation, diligence, and humility. By doing this, it fulfills karmic debts. The work you put into practice which seems to have no "reason" or true goal may very well be a demonstration to the Divine that you are willing to put rubber to road when it comes to materially committing to an intention. Studying music is spiritual work because there is only one way to get to Carnegie Hall (or its equivalent in the far, far future) and that is practice. Music is a mental plane shortcut that takes extraordinary physical plane diligence to master. It is simple but not easy. All it takes to be a musician is a few minutes to hours of practice a day... every day... for the rest of your life.

Stop dieting!

Dieting is the method by which you are puppetiered by malevolent vampires who steal your money, energy, and life force in order to line their pockets. Nobody should be permitted to install an emotional middleman between you and the food you must eat in order to survive. The best advice on eating came from Apollo, who left an extremely tiny canon of advice in the form of words: "Know thyself," and "Everything in moderation". The second best advice ever given on eating came from Hippocrates: "Let food be thy medicine and let medicine be thy food." 

Dieting keeps you enthralled by a phantom future that never arrives. You, but thin, cute, adored, successful, and living the dream. If you are morbidly obese, it will be suggested that you have half to ¾ of your stomach either rerouted or amputated in a brutal procedure called gastric bypass. This procedure may partially deliver what it promises -- extreme weight loss -- but it means you will never again be able to eat normally. It will also not strike at the root of the problem, and that is the need to go without eating for longer periods and the need to stop using food like an illicit substance. The only kinds of dieting anyone should ever do are light fasting, going without solid food for a maximum of two days at a time (such as religious fasts), or eliminating foods that you suspect might be causing allergies or other health problems. In my own case, I went from ovo-lacto vegetarian to strict vegan in 2010, and my cystic acne, the bane of my existence since puberty, virtually disappeared overnight. In hindsight, I believe that my acne was caused mostly by dairy consumption and that not eating it lowered the inflammation factors that did what Retin-A could not. I wish I had eliminated dairy sooner, as it was not the only health problem that was ameliorated by quitting it.

Start small and where you are

Deworm your mind of perfectionism parasites. Comparison is the thief of joy and mojo. Copycatting can only get you so far anyway -- if you are truly original, you will end up going the last mile alone. It begins with intention, and intention is nothing without material follow-through. If you want to become a musician, pick up an instrument and practice, even if it is a two chord jam or Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. If you want to own a restaurant someday, cook something with what few and inferior ingredients you have on hand, and it had better be good. If you want to be a mystic, pray, even though you are in a grotty public bathroom. If you want to get out of debt, make an economic sacrifice such as avoiding take out food for a time, and clean your toilet without fail every night. If you want a clean kitchen, do the dishes. Do not wait for anyone else to do them. If you hate the workaday world, start doing something else you love even though there is not a snowball's chance in hell of doing it full time . . . yet. 

Use what you've got

Living provisionally convinces us that life can only be lived fully in a future scenario. Happiness will only be achieved if the circumstances are right and X fulfills Y. Nope. Get it done. If you truly hate the one you are with, leave. Better sooner than later. If you want the wall painted, do it. Forgiveness, not permission. If you have not used the item in a few years because you think you will refurbish it, sell it, mend it, or shrink into it, nope, you won't. Throw it or give it away now. Say "thank you for your gifts, and I'm sorry I could not do what I planned with you" and let it go. If you need time outdoors, don't wait until work gives you a paid vacation or until you can save up to go to a sandy beach in the tropics. Go outside on your lunch break and breathe the air, stare at the sky, and give thanks to the local ecosystem, no matter how urbanized or fractured.

Of course it comes down to gratitude

Once again, I will end this essay with a reminder that everything is alive, everything carries intention, and the fastest way of connecting with the world around you is to thank it. The reason why cleaning your toilet helps you to draw more wealth is because it is all connected. The grateful individual who literally cleans up his own crap every night says to the Divine "Here I am, humbly cleaning my toilet." People who clean their own toilets do not take nice things for granted. They generally also do not take helpful people for granted, and that humble, grateful energy attracts helpers of the noncorporeal and corporeal varieties like flies to . . . well . . . you know. The journey of 10,000 miles begins with a single step. The symphony of 10,000 notes begins with one lousy pentachord. The journey to no longer working for the man begins with walking outside and sitting under a tree. 


Hey everyone! I am taking a break for the week of October 24, so I will not be writing the usual weekly essay next week. I am also taking a two week break from Ogham. Thanks for your ongoing patronage of my essays and readings.